6 Things I Learned About Empowering Myself from Sia’s Elastic Heart

Relationships end. Breakups can be awful. Whether we decide to end it or our partners do, there is always a period of adjustment and mourning.

Our logical analytical mind wants to swoop in, be the hero, and save us from our emotions so give it something to do instead of breaking down the same situations over and over again.

I have a tendency to over analyze things, which can be self-defeating; this is an example of the kind of analysis that is helpful.

Since Sia’s Elastic Heart came out I have played it (sometimes on repeat)  to bring me back to myself even when I am in the thralls of avoidance: dying my hair, remaking my bed (even if it’s clean) moving furniture, excessive baking, walking, you get the picture…

Listening to music, reading a book or watching a show can give us the inspiration we need to exercise the aspects of ourselves that left unattended can drive us crazy. We can find empowerment instead of self-defeat.

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ASMR for Procrastination

Relaxing video for procrastinators. ASMRtist Olivia Kissper uses water sounds and face brushing to help relax you and discusses procrastination and how she believes we can overcome the habit.

I Diagnose Myself a Scapegoat 

What is a Scapegoat?

To put it plainly: a person blamed for the wrongdoings, mistakes, or faults of others. What does that mean exactly?

It means that if you are someone’s scapegoat, you are going to be the reason someone else did or said something, or the reason something happened, or more broadly YOU are the problem.

The scapegoat is given a tremendous amount of power, but ends up feeling weak, shameful, pitiable, guilty, or that they are evil, bad, or wrong. In come cases, wrongness becomes inseparable from the way they see themselves: they can mistake what others say for their true identities.

In families, the scapegoat tends to be the person the family collectively identifies as a source of their dysfunctional behavior. The idea being that if the person to blame for familial disruption is somehow fixed, then the family will be fixed.